It always happened at church___indecent exposure! The first time it happened I was horrified. The second time it happened I thought hmm. The third time it happened I thought there was some kind of conspiracy going on. It all started one Sunday . . .
I was enjoying the worship music when something caught my attention. I looked down and saw a white scrap of material peeking out from the bottom of my trousers. Looking around, I hoped no one was watching and pulled the fabric.
Oh dear, now what’s this___a sock?
As I pulled, more and more fabric came. I tried wadding it into the palm of my hand. To my dismay, I held an under panty! I quickly stuffed it into my purse, praying nothing else would expose itself. While it was distracting and embarrassing, I decided to laugh about it.
A couple of weeks later, of course at church, my underwear decided to act up again. I looked down at my blouse and discovered I had triple peaks! One of my shoulder pads had found its way into my cleavage. It looked like a cosmetic surgeon’s first attempt at breast augmentation. I quickly reached in and pulled it out, hoping no one would think I was stuffing my bra. Was my underwear demon possessed, or was I just careless?
Just when I thought these incidences were coincidental, another one happened. I was walking down the aisle, headed for my seat when I felt something tug at my ankle. Yep! You guessed it . . . it was my half-slip! My steps became slow and strained. I prayed I would get to my seat before it dropped to the floor.
Oh fine, now how am I going to get this crazy slip up without anyone noticing. I hope I don’t have to step out of it!
I reached under my skirt band, wiggled my arm down as far as I could, and managed to grasp the slip without standing on my head. It was quite a feat. I’m sure anyone watching was amused.
The devil will go to great lengths to distract you while worshiping; at least that was the conclusion I came to after being chagrined more than once by my naughty underwear.
My underwear hasn’t acted up lately. Well, almost. There was one little risque’;I found one of my socks lying on the ground when I went to get into the car after church. I don’t know, maybe I am careless . . . .
“Pleasant words are as an honeycomb, sweet to the soul, and health to the bones”(Proverbs 16:24 KJV).